Thursday, January 28, 2010

"And They Will Rise up and Call Her Blessed..."

It's 7:06, Thursday morning. I am sitting in a hotel room having just had my Quiet Time with my Lord and having read an excellent post by my favorite blogger friend, Tara.

Bill and I are at our Annual Winter Conference for our mission This is our 5th year with the AMiA(Anglican Mission in the Americas) where my husband is the worship leader for our church plant, The River, (you can go to that site and look under staff to see my precious love, Bill. You can also see some of my children's photos throughout the site.)

Every year I look SO forward to coming to this conference. This year, not so much. = ) I HUNGERED to be HOME!!! I labored for 3 days in making a decision to come this year. The Lord has FINALLY granted me a HEART for HOME after 11 years of always being drawn outside of the home for ministry. This year has been a difficult year of pruning for me. Post Partum Depression...Burnout...hormonal issues with the finaling of lactating, having had our last precious flower 2 years ago.Every year I come to this conference looking forward to connecting with people from all over the world. I must confess that the Lord has revealed to me this year that I was seeking significance in much of my attitude towards outside ministry. I struggled from a deep place with JUST being home. I confess that. I HUNGERED to have a HEART FOR HOME for YEARS! But I just couldn't get there. It hurt that I could not rest and be satisfied at home. It hurt so much, especially knowing God's favor in after 10 years of barrenness He CHOSE to give us 5 PRECIOUS FLOWERS to raise! Why couldn't I rest in this blessing! Why did I need MORE!

This year the Lord has pruned me. Squashed me. Crushed unto Oswald Chambers "crushed grapes and poured out wine" for Him. I have now come to a place in the beginning of this Jubilee year for our family...2010...of HOME!

HOME!!! What a sweet and fruitful rich word that is! HOME!! Where LOVE is! Where sweet soft fat cheeks reside! Where little feet run and slide! Where big boy arms wrap around my waist as I do dishes! Where Sweet 10 year old daughter shares her times with her friends and her doll, Jennifer! Where 11 year old daughter laughs and tickles! Where my husband smiles and brings me a hug and kiss in gratefulness for his sweet haven he comes home to. THANK YOU, JESUS!!! For your LIFE in me that I can BE the HEART of the HOME as you have called your daughters to as Moms! We are the HEART ...the LIFEBLOOD of our homes...what a HUGE privilege to pump the life blood of our families for Jesus sake.

Peace be with all you mommies out there. May you fully engage in your action as a Mom to bring life and love and rest and fruit to your families! And if you have a minute lift up my little ones as I am away from them. and missing them TERRIBLY!!!! = )


Two Shades of Pink said...

A soul feeding post. Just wonderful.

Cheryl said...

Hi Jessica...thank you, my friend. = )