Monday, March 8, 2010

Please, Lord...the MADNESS!!!

"Jesus, help me."

"Jesus, rescue me."

"Jesus, you are the only one that can deliver me from the MADNESS!"

Last week, I shared that I had become quite overwhelmed and reached for that chocolate Easter Bunny, right? has been a week and the enemy is within my blood and is standing ground as Master over me, and his name is....CHOCOLATE. 

~To go through my days "preoccupied" with WHEN the next time will present itself for me to partake of something chocolate. 

~To feel the racing thoughts and struggle to keep my focus. 

~To feel the irritability rising in me at any given moment. 

~To not be able to respond to the children with a 
peaceful, fully attentive, attitude of love. 

I'm sure other people struggle with the same thing, but after going 3 months without any chocolate and then to have two bouts of it in a three week period I see the horrible toll it takes on my whole being. 
To be able to focus on preparing dinner, cleaning zones in my home, engaging the children with patience and peace...drastically more difficult than without it in my system. 

I write this tonight because this is what is "on my mind" and I can't stand it and want to be free once again. 
If you feel led, please lift a prayer for me for deliverance, strength to combat the intense cravings, and patience and focus to get through the next week of detoxing my system. 



Prudence said...

why don't you just keep some organic dark chocolate on hand to have a tiny bit everyday? It is good for you!

Cheryl said...

Hi Prudence,

I would LOVE to be able to do that. But, for me, it's still chocolate. I don't know why certain foods affect my mood and attitude they way they do, but in order for me to live a calm and productive life I can't have certain things in my system...chocolate, dairy, gluten, red meat. If I have these in my diet I find myself getting out of control and out of sync. I LOVE my GOOD diet, it's just hard to get back to it once I have these in my system, it takes about a week to be free of it, but in that week...UGH! fatigue, major irritabilty, no focus...not pretty. = ) But OH I would LOVE to be able to have healthy chocolate...just a bit...but, alas, I can't. = )